tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85251431558197814042024-02-06T19:50:46.885-08:00DougieG's sick-noteDougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.comBlogger51125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-10268596488675998382010-04-28T03:26:00.000-07:002010-04-28T06:34:26.851-07:00Captain's Log - Star Date: 20.10.28.04Boy oh boy, am I a lucky jack?<br />The Doc told me yesterday<br />That I was "bang on track"<br /><br /><br />Your operation to cut out glands<br />It went really well, and<br />We ended up with lots in our hands<br /><br />In all we removed there was no cancer<br />So as far we can see<br />We have killed of the invading <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">chancer</span><br /><br />So it time for you to go recover<br />With monthly check ups<br />To give us all some cover<br /><br /><br />Well can you please take my feeding tube?<br />I suppose I can arrange that, yes<br />And out it popped with the aid of some lube<br /><br /><br />So while that leaves yet another hole<br />It seems, for the moment<br />That I am once again whole<br /><br />Tho' don't feel like trumpets or big celebration<br />As my thoughts turn to those<br />Who are still on the treatment rotation.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-33768134551941522892010-04-25T10:23:00.000-07:002010-04-25T12:39:20.344-07:00Rubber earOne funny side effect of having some cut a large flap in your neck is that the nerve ends round about it don't work so well in the weeks (and, possibly, months) after.<br /><br />So, combined with the odd situation where, post-radiotherapy, I get stubble in a little diamond shaped area around my chin, which is surrounded by an almost completely baby smooth area, I've now got feeling down one side of my face and neck, but not down a fair bit of the other.<br /><br />This explains why it wasn't sore get unzipped, but the funniest bit is my right ear, where I can feel the front little but of cartilage, but then anything beyond that feels sort of like that <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">pins'n'needles</span> feel you get if you sit reading you book in the toilet too long (boys) or sit with one leg folded under you for too long (girls).<br /><br />To my hand its like a rubber ear and to my ear its like I've only a very faint feeling, which is mighty odd when you try and put an earphone in. It must be like trying to put one in someone <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">else's</span> ear; you need to use both hands to direct the plug into the wee hole rather than just being able to guide it in with one hand.<br /><br />Still, mustn't grumble, could have an unwelcome lump instead.<br /><br />Next stage is back to the 'joint consultation' this coming Tuesday, where I should hear from the full range of medical disciplines and find out what they found in the flesh, lump, muscle and vein that got the chop.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-60710714283297753642010-04-25T10:05:00.000-07:002010-04-25T12:34:00.346-07:00Papering over the cracks<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzpeLG0QgK7MkwvRoriwHtU3aa1epui4ajYIfExRHz4FUcM_qoZiyQYCqwIZvtLOn7zYPbbeUdDp7EotbSp5auwNRb4i1qB0bm6gV9csZypec5KGQs3WezT-AbRNMJ6eT7DZliF6VG4Cby/s1600/008.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 300px; FLOAT: right; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5464160421297441330" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzpeLG0QgK7MkwvRoriwHtU3aa1epui4ajYIfExRHz4FUcM_qoZiyQYCqwIZvtLOn7zYPbbeUdDp7EotbSp5auwNRb4i1qB0bm6gV9csZypec5KGQs3WezT-AbRNMJ6eT7DZliF6VG4Cby/s400/008.jpg" /></a> Well, two weeks of zipneck came to an end on Friday when the Practise Nurse at the GP Surgery popped my staples out. <span style="font-size:78%;">(Image courtesy of Keir Klics) </span><br /><div><div><br /><div>She counted them first (24, and nowhere near her record of 50). I asked if they hook under like normal paper attaching staples - "oh, yes - just the same, so I have a special tool to get them out". To be honest it was painless - there's a good reason for that - and her tool looked like a wee pair of scissors that kind of slip under then open to pull the little blighters apart, before lifting and separating.</div><br /><div>Only wee issue, which I'm sorry to say that you can't see from the photo, is that "your wound hasn't bonded very well at the front". Remarkably, most of it seemed to fold neatly inwards and leave an attractive line down my neck, except the bit at the front - which must have been where I was oozing from immediately after the op -"where there is a small gap, and I think it needs held with these paper stitches." </div><br /><div>So, I've got some paper over the gap for a few days and I've to lay off the exercises in case my head falls off.</div></div></div>DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-37281470902021112632010-04-16T08:48:00.000-07:002010-04-16T09:09:36.217-07:00Home Stationery<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghKdfwS-l5cL_KOTKeLzj4j3KfYm4lch0wslSgLq2yMK_EIHMFZNTIH07536diSt4qPG7tFRoxl1rlWoa5W_N3mHHOtVruIq8uumNYgw2cE4Wj0YydKHlNyvuJJ88JpfoKN655raVO4yHp/s1600/003.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 300px; FLOAT: right; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5460767670119150226" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghKdfwS-l5cL_KOTKeLzj4j3KfYm4lch0wslSgLq2yMK_EIHMFZNTIH07536diSt4qPG7tFRoxl1rlWoa5W_N3mHHOtVruIq8uumNYgw2cE4Wj0YydKHlNyvuJJ88JpfoKN655raVO4yHp/s400/003.jpg" /></a>After revealing my drainage issues on Tuesday & Wednesday, offers flooded in from people with good plumbing contacts. Though thankfully my other <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">downpipe</span> dried up overnight Wednesday and I was unplumbed on Thursday.<br /><br />More of the same from the fairly <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">feisty</span> Staff Nurse "just you take a deep breath and I'll....jeez is this one even longer...". Still, drains out, cannula out of hand and then able to have shower without bits of kit to bother about. Luxury. Well, relative luxury of an <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">echoey</span> wet-room shared with the 6-man and just the odd streak of the red stuff to mop up.<br /><br /><br />So home Thursday PM and having pulled the final dressings off today, here's a cleaned up photo showing my stationery supplies since I know that some of you enjoyed the first one so much!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">ps</span> Next week should see the start of a new spot the drain hole competition, open to the eagle eyed who can win a gift wrapped length of plastic tubing and a short course in staple removing.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-62624975861979075202010-04-15T13:54:00.000-07:002010-04-15T14:39:06.589-07:00Numbness and NervesAfter my oozy night, early move and plumbing operation, I was just dozing off when I was aware of the magic curtain closing as three new nurses who announced that they were from the brilliantly entitled 'pain team'. <br /><br />Was this the masochists nasty nurse dream? <br />Or were they simply from a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">mis</span>-named team?<br />The latter I'm afraid my <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">fetish</span> fad friends<br />They simply wanted to supply drugs for pain avoidance ends<br />I'm not sure yet what happened to the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">tramadol</span> promised<br />When I answered "I'm too numb to tell to be completely honest"<br />Soon off they all went with cheery wave<br />As the physiotherapist appeared my shoulder to save<br />Could I try to do this, and could I maybe do that<br />Exercises in a smock - must have looked a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">prat</span><br />Good news though too, about my movement in fact<br />The surgeon had left my shoulder nerve completely intact<br />So exercises 3 times a day for months to follow<br />To make sure I can cope after a muscle was hollowed.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-60309051855936211992010-04-15T13:29:00.000-07:002010-04-15T13:54:22.464-07:00Re-coveringSo Tuesday came and Tuesday went<br />Those Nurses are really heaven sent<br />They mopped my ooze through day and night<br />Not moan to be heard about their messy plight<br /><br />I lost count of the time my neck was re-covered<br />Then on Wednesday morning a dry drain was discovered<br />Not sure if this is what prompted the change<br />But soon it was time for a ward that was strange<br /><br />Quite soon a Doctor was doing the round<br />And confirmed the 'drain 2' judgement was sound<br />I'd a sudden lift, then dawning sensation<br />How would it feel on drain extrication?<br /><br />But not worry, its just an everyday chore<br />Said the nurse as she asked "have you had one before?"<br />Just you sit there now and take a deep breath<br />And she tugged out some tube about 4 inches in length!DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-5223259068100004102010-04-15T12:54:00.000-07:002010-04-15T13:29:10.398-07:00What the L?<div>Though some parts have been caused to swell</div><div>And you can't really see the full shaped L</div><div>I captured a photo of the fine stitching job</div><div>Achieved whilst under the surgeon's spell</div><div> </div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmV0vlk5A99jALPI5O1Ohv_MvusFXM_nLLZi6FTaWnG3WkZxdZ239nJaphVtAfxY8u0WKI4flRMJe4DaU-7UD4hUKMsutwWAsvMevUQR_kjRl-I9SAvr1iY8mCFyhCPb22vxjdFMACcUg3/s1600/Staples+n+drains.jpg"><img style="WIDTH: 400px; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5460460215923532658" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmV0vlk5A99jALPI5O1Ohv_MvusFXM_nLLZi6FTaWnG3WkZxdZ239nJaphVtAfxY8u0WKI4flRMJe4DaU-7UD4hUKMsutwWAsvMevUQR_kjRl-I9SAvr1iY8mCFyhCPb22vxjdFMACcUg3/s400/Staples+n+drains.jpg" /></a><br /><div> </div>DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-52355502191675501882010-04-13T05:01:00.000-07:002010-04-13T05:15:01.135-07:00More Stitches Than an Arran JumperTuesday 13th<br /><br />Woke, slept had blood mopped up and made use of several bottles through the night.<br /><br />Couldn't really get out of bed due to wooziness, drip full of drugs to my left and two bottles attached to tubes running from my neck on the right.<br /><br />The tubes it seems are my 'wound drains' and are the measure of when I'll get home. Too much drain means I'll just be stayin'. One of them is oozing though and so I made a bloody mess of my smock and bed. Socks were OK.<br /><br />After new dressing, porridge, new dressing, Dr's round, then new dressing I was allowed/sent to the bathroom whilst they cleaned my bed.<br /><br />Quickly de-smocked I finally got a look at the giant inverted L Guy had cut for me and the lovely stitch work that any seamstress would be proud of.<br /><br />And, well, that's it so far, except for a new dressing that's about 3 inches square held on by a 5 x 4 sticky pad Photo if I can manage it!<br /><br />More tales of recovery later...DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-43394288424006122722010-04-13T04:39:00.000-07:002010-04-13T05:01:10.291-07:00Smocks, Socks and Bed HopsMonday 12th<br /><br />After water only breakfast, got to SJH in good time for my morning chop. But an amazing array of bed changes going on meant I was able to enjoy daytime telly between 8am and roughly 11.25am. My nice clean bed came with the usual operation smock. And, a new pair of highly fashionable socks.<br /><br />The socks it seems are to help prevent DVT as I would be lying still for up to 5hrs during the Op. Plain white knee length with a gap between the toes for ventilation, if you must know!<br /><br />Bit of a queue outside the theatre meant I had a few minutes chat while they "cleaned up the previous one". Discussed today's music choice and was told that there would be a wee air bed too that periodically lifted them up to keep them moving. All very clever. Before I knew it, the sound of Guys' Motown Surgery Selection was fading fast and next I knew I was waking in the recovery room around 7pm.<br /><br />After a wee wait due to a tad queasiness I was wheeled back to my ward, but to a different room. Seems the first rooms gender designation had changed while I was a way and all the blokes I was with earlier were scattered round this new one having had their Ear, Nose or Throat sliced, diced or spliced. Too dopey to see what mine looks like, but I could feel admiring glances...DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-82929231122739481652010-04-11T14:26:00.000-07:002010-04-11T15:09:14.341-07:00Cool GuyWell, I said I'd be back soon and here we are again.<br /><br />Though the post-radiotherapy month of nothingness seemed long, I guess it just blip for someone of my grand old age and when it came to an end, boy did things start moving again.<br /><br />Over the past two weeks, I saw the dentist, who could give me a filling if I didn't mind. Mickey Mouse one it was with no anaesthetic and then she asks if I could see the hygienist. Of course. Tomorrow? <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Jings</span>! Well, bit of a bump back to earth here with lessons on <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">tooth brushing</span>, advice on cleaning between teeth (with new tee-pee brushes, which are weird) and strong advice on the need to comply if I want to keep my teeth in a post-<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">saliva</span> existence. <br /><br />Two days later and I'm back again for a chest/neck CT scan (with contrast!). Nae bother really, the contrast being a dye they can follow through your system, which I guess helps spot unusual blockages on the way. Understanding here was that I'd get results from the scan the following Tuesday at the 'joint consultation'.<br /><br />The joint consultation was kind of where it all kicked of in earnest back on October with a large cast of experts from: <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">ENT</span>, dentist, oncology etc. Surprisingly though, Anne and I were simply met by this one guy; the surgeon.<br /><br />His technique <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">reminded</span> me of some managers' approach, with an opening gambit asking me why I thought I was there!? Eh? Well, to get the results of my scan and confirm that surgery is going ahead.<br /><br />Well, pretty much he said, but there's no real 'result' from the scan, though, yes, he would be going ahead with surgery on 12 April. You see, the scan is never really conclusive and in actual fact his experience shows that they will go ahead with surgery and then find that in up 45% of cases, what they have removed was completely benign. Great.<br /><br />What about complications? Ah, well, Guy usually asks his students which items (apart from the glands that have to go) from neck muscle, nerve <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">running</span> to shoulder and jugular vein can safely go. It seems there are plenty of other veins, he'll take the muscle round about - "which will leave your neck a little uneven", but the nerve is important for neck, shoulder movement and he'll look to avoid damaging that completely. Goodness.<br /><br />Oh and he'll try to make squiggly incisions, not because he can't make straight ones, but <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">apparently</span> they'll help healing as shoulder movement may put too much tension and pull open a straight wound. Beard?<br /><br />Topping this was his advice on recovery. The oncology guys reckon I'll be in for two days? <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">Erm</span>, yes, two days minimum, maybe more like four, it just depends on how well the 'drains' work on your wounds. Yes. Drains.<br /><br />And, after that? Oh, could be 6-8 week I think, because your still recovering from radiotherapy, which is a pain for us surgeons, and the operation takes 5-6 hours - a long time under anaesthetic. <br /><br />If radiotherapy doesn't help surgeons, why do they do it first? Really doesn't matter to me says, Guy, I'll chop out just as much whether I operate before or after - just to be safe!<br /><br />I guess that's great, and there's nothing else to do but pack my <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">PJs</span> and slippers and get to St John's for 8am tomorrow!<br /><br />Gory details to follow in a few days...DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-6773194723742110952010-03-26T09:56:00.000-07:002010-03-26T10:45:53.746-07:00Ashes to Ashes"So Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span>, how have things developed since your concept post 'mission status'?"<br /><br />"Well, to be honest, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">DG</span>, (can I call you <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">DG</span>?) that concept was a while in the brewing and I think I was at a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">substancial</span> high when it popped in there to set a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">melancholical</span> melody to a musical maestro's masterpiece."<br /><br />"Interesting. Can you expand at all on how it 'popped in there'?"<br /><br />"Well, it just popped, I can't really explain how ideas occur when ones mind is a muddle of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">morphinic</span> manifestations. Though one aspect may be the juxtaposition between being abandoned in space, whilst seemingly linked, but just out of reach, of the world you know. Do you know what I mean."<br /><br />"Not entirely, but I guess some of your references are to out of body experiences, as it were, induced by a certain state of mind and, well, lets be frank, powerful drugs."<br /><br />"You seem to be setting Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span> up as some sort of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">junky</span>."<br /><br />"<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">Junky</span>, flunky or organ grinder's monkey, the implication is there that some of your thinking at the time was enhanced in some way."<br /><br />"Yeah, I suppose in that respect you could imply that Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span> was a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_10" class="blsp-spelling-error">junky</span>. Whatever the case I think he and I have moved on since then. You know, we're back in the capsule and mission control have come up with some ideas to pull this rabbit out the hat."<br /><br />"You're losing me I'm afraid."<br /><br />"Well, lets just say that there has been a connection repaired and while they need to check out my status first, they seem to have some operation being prepared behind the scenes that will draw this mission to a clinical conclusion."<br /><br />"That sounds good, I think. I know you need to go now, but would you be happy to come back into the studio in the next week or two to give us an update."<br /><br />"Yeah, sure. I guess by then I'll be hoping to be the man who safely returned to earth."DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-71363186935405354062010-03-26T04:06:00.000-07:002010-03-26T05:44:02.049-07:00Mission Status(May work best with this <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjserchJ3BY">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjserchJ3BY</a> playing in background...) Hmmph, can't get link to work live - try to get Space Oddity playing on you tube first.<br /><br />Western General to Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span><br />Western General to Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span><br />Take your morphine and your paracetamol<br />(10) Western General (9) to Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span> (8)<br />(7, 6) We'll do an operation (5) - just don't know when (4)<br />(3, 2) Get a sick-line (1) and we'll be in touch with you.....<br /><br />This is Western General to Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span>, you've nearly made the grade<br />All the nurses want to know whose slippers you wear<br />And the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">dietitian</span> wants you to eat more if you dare<br /><br />This is Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span> to Western General, I'm feeling rather bored<br />And I'm floating in the most peculiar way<br />All the days just seem to come then drift away<br />Here am I floating round the kitchen far from the world<br />The tiles are white & blue and there's nothing real to do<br /><br />Though I'm past the heavy treatment now, it feels like limbo land<br />At least the mucous has really started to go<br />So I'm not such a regular at the spittoon bowl<br />Western General to Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span>, just take the drugs if the pain goes on<br />Just take the drugs please Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span><br />And eat more Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">Gowan</span><br />But look out for constipation<br />Are you listening....<br />Here are am I sitting in the kitchen - and I hope for progress soon<br />The tiles are white & blue but there's nothing real to do<br /><br />(c) <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">EMI</span>DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-1683943889180238732010-03-03T06:41:00.000-08:002010-03-05T07:07:42.414-08:00One Man and his MucousWhen zapping was done<br />I thought, quick - run<br />Get out of here<br />And have some fun<br /><br />But dozing next day<br />There was no sign of play<br />Just replacement blood<br />To keep the red-count OK<br /><br />Then Monday came<br />With more of the same<br />Just no zapping<br />To give the day frame<br /><br />So I started a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Wii</span> Fit yoga regime<br />Squeezed in between the drugs routine<br />And the sleeps and the feeds<br />At least it gives me a change of scene<br /><br />Mentioned to the Doc my situation<br />She agreed post zapping can cause deflation<br />As many like to think its all over<br />But side-effects are just reaching peak concentration<br /><br />So I sought a target for my neck-section Op<br />Dr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Junor</span> has promised she'll book it up<br />But keep taking morphine and the pain at bay<br />Until the flow of mucous comes to a stop<br /><br />The morning glut I've mentioned before<br />Brought on by the initial <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">toothbrushing</span> chore<br /><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Though</span> that seems to have reduced for now<br />And been replaced by a near hourly score<br /><br />Sometimes thin and almost runny<br />Other times more gluey like a jar of honey<br />With family favourites the ones<br />That are choking, thick and <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">muttony</span><br /><br />So that's the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">latest</span> from mucous glut man<br />As I sit here with my <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">spittoon</span> to hand<br />It seems there's a phase 3 and maybe 4<br />Which I'll be on to update you whenever I canDougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-58239526836812398712010-02-25T15:22:00.000-08:002010-02-25T07:57:41.176-08:00Zappometer<strong><span style="font-size:130%;">Zappometer off-line for update. Phone 57777 to listen to message for next estimated update.</span></strong>DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-68451644544924200542010-02-22T06:53:00.000-08:002010-02-22T07:11:03.870-08:00Crotchless Pants?What with the ever increasing use of the old feeding tube, I was saying to one of the ladies the other day - during balloon top up reminder class - that I need a bit more tape to get my tube stuck up out of the way again.<br /><br />Oh, she said, have we need offered you one of these before - pulling something from a drawer - I think they are like boob tubes. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">That'll</span> save you lots of taping, especially since you'll be using it 3 or 4 times a day! Well, not to sure about boob tubes for the 40 something man, but as she opened up the splendid garment - what was there other than a pair of your <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">grandad's</span> Y-fronts, from the matching set that went with the string vest, but with the crotch cut off. <br /><br />What a magnificent sight I must have been for this morning's zaps following just a week-end of undress rehearsal with my new string cor-set.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-46918913917831656102010-02-21T08:18:00.000-08:002010-02-22T06:40:38.020-08:00Strange but true.......last summer when I was in Sweden with Anne and the boys, we were accosted late one night in Stockholm Central by these two <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">young</span> Swedes - they turned out to be the journalist and his photographer form a local daily and were doing their daily survey where they ask opinions of the people in the street. Did Anne think sun-beds were a good or bad thing?<br /><br />Can't really remember her answer which did appear next day, though I can now say that they give you quite bad sun-burn if you go everyday for 6 weeks and don't wear anything other than a plastic mask.<br /><br />Its oddly shaped too (the sunburn) - sort of like the shape of a medieval armour piece that protects the collar bone and side of the neck, with funny white gap in the centre - perhaps if you left your armour in the sun over a lunch and forgot just how hot those dammed crusades were, then you too could have been branded in the same style as you popped it back on for that afternoon's adventure.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-49094277670784358282010-02-21T07:56:00.000-08:002010-02-22T06:53:33.637-08:00Fur ballsSome vague memory from school days came to mind this week - some video of an owl regurgitating a fur ball to get rid of the bits of mouse it couldn't digest. Strangely like a tiny cough and there it was, except mine was more like a food coated mucous ball. The first one was like a pea and ham gobstopper, I'll spare you details of No 2, - peculiar though the capacity that your body has that it can keep a gobstopper hanging around your throat unnnoticed until you're watching TV with the family and...cough, then you find yet another talent that Gallup don't seem to list.<br /><br />Also on the furry front is my head - I'd noticed that some hair growth was creeping back, I mean, I had to shave twice last week! But while face growth seems limited to fu manchu style area, more overall coverage was appearing on my head. So out with the clippers it was but it was odd with no real feeling of of the usual zzzzmmmm as they cut through hair, instead I was building up little tufts of fluff like you might find on shaving a teenagers top lip. Still de-fluffed and polished up I am for week 7 at the solarium.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-62405516518359956012010-02-21T07:31:00.000-08:002010-02-21T07:56:25.599-08:00Regimental FatiguesBlimey, someone has removed the stuffing this past week. I know that Doc <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Junor</span> and her Posse have told me that the radiotherapy regiment will make me tired, but this really came home to roost with my afternoon siesta an alarming three 3 hours one day.<br /><br />So Tuesday it was I think that consisted of up, shower, one man and his porridge, blast at LA3, blast at LA4, Chemo, home, kip 'til 6. <br /><br />So, sorry to those of you I was in touch with last week about about a visit - just couldn't predict when I was going to be fit for active duty so didn't come up with any times for you.<br /><br />Now on to 3 of those food supplements down the tube each day and extra strong drugs - Morphine and Giant <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">Paracetamol</span> along with the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">mucozade</span>. Maybe they have some to do with sleeping for Scotland too!DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-13251716673835842502010-02-14T06:14:00.000-08:002010-02-21T07:10:52.162-08:00Up & DownUp, down, up, down, up...yes that's it you got the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">rhythm</span> from last week (8<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span>-14<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span>), which was up and down and loads of different fronts.<br /><br />Down to hospital, up from hospital, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">biorhythms</span> up, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">biorhythms</span> down, trouble getting food down, trouble with food coming back up, red blood count down, red blood count back up, weight down, food in the tube up, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">cannae</span> be <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">botheredness</span> up, time to go down.<br /><br />Started the week brightly enough I think, but some spurts of sickness and possibly the Chemo put paid to that Tuesday/Wednesday. Was threatened with another blood transfusion, but remarkably my blood count seemed to climb at the thought and that was put on hold. Chirpy again by Friday though.<br /><br />Only two weeks of this phase to go then recovery stuff before its time for the lovely sounding "neck-section". Hope I get a nice cut.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-20606217582651176162010-02-10T06:52:00.000-08:002010-02-10T07:44:00.126-08:00A mucii, a mucose, a mucositisWith the change of radiotherapy regime, came... a carrier bag full of drugs to help stave off <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">mucositis</span>. Yep, lovely, eh, just gargle after me one more time, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">mucositis</span>.<br /><br /><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Mucositis</span> is an <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">extension</span> of my gooey glut really, its where the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">mucii</span> takes over and makes you mouth and throat so <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">mucousy</span> (yes, I'm making some of them up) that you can't eat and drink. Not good. <br /><br />So, prevention is the order of the day with <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">mucaine</span> (...a running around my vein) the much vaunted favourite at the Western. I suppose its only part of the package though, since it coats the throat to ease swallowing - sort of like a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">mucozade</span> drink to aid recovery. On top of that are these soluble co-<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">codamol</span> tabs that seem big enough for a pack of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">Dugs</span>, never mind a wee one like me. And, there's no getting away from it, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_10" class="blsp-spelling-error">Movitall</span>, because the colossal co-<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_11" class="blsp-spelling-error">codamol</span> can cause constipation. Which is sh...DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-11364922688853983672010-02-04T08:38:00.000-08:002010-02-08T08:56:25.417-08:00Double blast news at lastWell, well, well - it turns out that Phase II isn't exactly more of the same. I mean I'm sure it will feel the same and look the same, with the same mask drill, same <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">meshy</span> face and background music, but this other <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Zappatron</span> seems to fire electrons rather than photons.<br /><br />As <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Captain</span> Kirk and Mr <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Sulu</span> would tell you, this is because photon torpedoes are very effective at destroying unwanted <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">Clingons</span>. But, as Doc <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">Junor</span> drew for me on Thursday this means my first 20 zaps had a wider target area than I thought and its a bit spine tingling to find out that my chord has been part of the area, so now they want to tone that down. So it'll be photons to front, electrons to the rear (.....here I am stuck like a tumour in you...<br /><br />stuck like a tumour in you,<br />and I'm wondering why I ever first grew,<br />its so hard to keep growing this pace,<br />when I'm getting zapped all over the place,<br />photons to the front, electrons to the rear,<br />here I am stuck like a tumour in you...eh sorry, went off on one there)<br /><br />The idea is that <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">ol</span>' lumpy still gets blasted with photons as they have deep throat penetration, but the glands and the rest of my neck will be downgraded to electron zapping from Monday. Can't wait!DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-49784631895551394892010-02-03T06:17:00.000-08:002010-02-04T08:34:54.731-08:00Swallowing lessonsWell not exactly lessons, but a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">detailed</span> discussion with a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">dietitian</span> today on the causes of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">tickly</span> coughs during throat cancer cures.<br /><br />Glut woman was on form again today and had a colleague who was keen to test my swallow action, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">especially</span> when I said that sometimes get a spluttering cough when I'm drinking. Which can be messy. You see, its possibly all to do with the swallow reflex not working properly and meaning that the epiglottis doesn't properly close over the larynx to prevent food or drink entering the windpipe. But why?<br /><br />They don't know, but had me try out gulps and sips while they had a hands-on observation of my swallow action. Thankfully I didn't choke at the time but have promised to keep them posted on what triggers my occasional splutters - like this morning's coffee that I was enjoying until it was forcefully ejected during the pharyngeal phase and halted the esophageal stage abruptly!DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-85802253241776941552010-02-01T13:03:00.000-08:002010-02-01T13:15:25.941-08:00Struck a chordI finally created chip in the professional veneer or the LA3 massive today when they changed the music for me so that I could play my air guitar whilst <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">im</span>-meshed in the zapping routine.<br /><br />Bit of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Lynyrd</span> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Sknyrd</span> to strum to while the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Zappatron</span> went about its business. OK, pop fans, it is soft rock for the mass market - in fact Neil Young's piss-take of Sweet Home Alabama beats it - but at least its recognition that girlie warblers can be known to prolong the experience rather than help it pass.<br /><br />Perhaps, there will be Jam <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">tomorrow</span>.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-15498827491887278652010-02-01T13:01:00.000-08:002010-02-01T13:14:45.596-08:00Zappedy Doo-dah<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Zappedy</span> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">doo</span>-<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">dah</span>, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">zappedy</span>-<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">aay</span>, my oh my I get zapped every day.<br /><br />And, apparently, there's a phase II! Last week passed without any alarms and only really my self-inflicted side-effect to bother me. 5 zaps, blood sample, weighed twice, quickie chemo, chat with dietitian, balloon updated and consultation with Doc J & the posse.<br /><br />Interesting twist was when the nurses pinned me to the bed on Friday and said they'd be a wee big longer today, "as you know, for your 2<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">nd</span> phase, you need more markings on your mask". Eh, well, no, I didn't know about phase II actually. "<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">Ock</span>, just a different angle of attack that they'll do at LA6 from the end of next week".<br /><br />Didn't ask if LA6 had a pet name, but will wait to get 1st hand reaction from that team. Not sure what it really means yet, but think that my daily left, right & center zaps (yes its really 3 a day) will increase by 2 or 3 so that at the final curtain of this plot, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">Withnail</span> & I can go our separate ways.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8525143155819781404.post-46277777604453990592010-02-01T12:39:00.000-08:002010-02-01T12:55:08.738-08:00Funny Ballon AnimalOne thing I forget to tell about the tube, is how its kept in place now that the early scaffolding has gone. It's a balloon trick!<br /><br />You see, there's a wee balloon on the inside that gets inflated, if you can <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">inflate</span> something with water, so that it acts like an anchor on the inside. Sort of like a harpoon, Dad? asked Keir - well yes, but with smoother edges. On the outside I have a 'bumper' that I need to keep close to the surface -except for the daily twist and clean routine - and that way I've a tube retaining mechanism.<br /><br />It seems though that the water inside gradually evaporates, gets out or generally reduces in volume - they didn't seem clear on how - so I get to use another valve to extract last week's remains and top up with a new 5ml syringe. Science<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">tastic</span>.DougieGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739073494794649073noreply@blogger.com1